What a Wonderful World Full of Troubles
July 21, 2011 18 Comments
I checked my bank account and saw how poor I am. I can save some money by not shopping … for food.. Good news is that I needed to go on a diet anyway.
I poured sour milk on my cereal. It’s a good thing I noticed the clumps before I started eating.
I ran out of shampoo and washed my hair with soap. My hair is now nice and Irish Spring fresh.
My keys got stuck on the front door keyhole. I broke into a sweat struggling to release it until I called a friend (30 minutes later) who suggested I lube with WD 40.
I saw a skinny teen eating a bag of chips and sipping on a shake. All that goodness will catch up to her hips in 20 years.
I have an itchy red rash on my arm. I checked Web MD. It could be shingles or an insect bite … I’m hoping for bugs.
I felt my hymen growing back ’cause it’s been so long since I “Nookied.” Help me see something positive about that.
When I’m in a funk this cover song by Joey Ramone reminds me what a wonderful world it is despite the occasional malfunction of the universe.
Visit my fan page on Facebook.
© 2011 Lafemmeroar