Thoughts about the World from a Crazy Chick
September 2, 2013 25 Comments
Although I always say that laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it, I must admit that I just can’t laugh when my noodle twists and ponders about the mysteries of the world. That is until I was able to answer them with satisfaction:
Why does a Schlong stray? Because it’s not happy unless it catches a disease or gets divorced.
Why do fatty foods taste so good? Because corpulence cannot exist without being “over-fed.”
Why do “dumb as dirt” people always get promoted? Because they’re smart enough to stick their nose up the rectum of bosses that value stupidity.
How do celebrities stay so thin? They implant parasites in their system that drain the calories from food.
What causes inflation? The “hot air” from greedy CEOs that rule the world.
Why is it that some men can’t stop thinking dirty thoughts? Because their brains are made up of sewer debris.
Why do drunks say the stupidest things? Because a noodle soaked in alcohol drops about 69 I.Q. points.