Being Sad Sucks

Dear Readers,

Lately I have been thinking that I’m a rather insensitive person. I laugh at the malfunction of the universe because it’s better than crying about it … I say it all the time because … frankly …

being sad sucks…

But I just realized that I haven’t really had a deep thoughtful cry in a very long time. And as “light” as I try to be on this blog, I must admit that my mind is a twisted knot of convolutions most of the time. So … I’ve been asking myself why I react and do certain things the way I do …

I’m a crazy chick when I’m at my best … but is that it? Is it enough to live life always looking at the bright side or the funny side of things? Love? Life? Loss? Relationships? I don’t know … 

I know I’m being nebulous, but … I’m cryptic and private that way.

I’ve been so comfortable in not feeling sad that perhaps I’ve given up on true joy? I mean in the most deep soul-filling way …? I don’t know. I just keep telling myself that being sad sucks … and I haven’t been sad in a long time. 

So I repeat … lately I’ve been feeling rather off balance as if I’m on the verge of … I don’t know what … maybe I don’t want to know. All I know is that struggling doesn’t make one strong … but it does make one understand better. I want to understand myself better … I want to understand people better … I want to understand you better … I want to be more emphatic … sensitive … and I think this requires a bit of letting oneself face the firing squad.

Here’s hoping that the firing squad are bad shots …

I think I need to feed my soul with writing instead of cocktails tonight …

Be well … my friends.

All my best,

L

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© 2013 Lafemmeroar

Health, Excess and Holiday Stress

Thanksgiving took a toll on my body. I ate and drank as if it were the last day on earth.When I woke up Friday I found a note on my pillow.

***

Dear Lafemme,

By Tibor Végh (Tenerife 2010 124.JPG) [CC-BY-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

After months of eating healthy you finally cleansed your body of the toxins you’ve been polluting it with for most of your life. And in one day you ruined all that hard work by opening your pie hole to all that fatty food loaded with butter, eggs and who knows what else. To top it off, you imbibed so much booze that you were barely able to walk straight at the end of the night. What kind of way is that to treat your inner organs? Do you want to end up looking like a crazy chick version of this whale man on the beach?

Have you no shame?

Online Dating Misadventures Part 1

An old post for my new readers … 

Years ago I subscribed to an online dating site called e-Harmony. I answered their lengthy questionnaire and I received two matches of men whose profiles depicted them to be bitter and angry about the world and relationships. Did my matches from eHarmony want a woman or a punching bag? Was it me? Did my responses  (oh I don’t know) suggest that I’m a good match for such men?

How I Defy Reality

When my birthday cake has so many candles that it borders on being a fire hazard, I just think it’s the 4th of July.

I have a carnival mirror that makes me look 10 pounds thinner.

When I watch politicians arguing on T.V., I just pretend I’m watching a sitcom.

I believe that heartbreak is a workout for your heart … it takes the lickin’ but

Why I Love Driving in Traffic

Wikimedia Commons Photography by: [http://www.fotografar.net Osvaldo Gago] {{cc-by-sa-2.5}} Category:Traffic

You can listen to your favorite tunes and forget that you haven’t moved in the last 15 minutes.

You can make friends with that hunky traffic cop who gave you a ticket for talking on your cell phone.

Once you’re on bumper to bumper traffic, you can fiddle with your radio settings then almost get into an accident because you weren’t watching the road. But what’s the point you’re not going anywhere anyway!

Food Contamination

Lafemmeroar here with a very overdue blog post:

Okay, so I’m still into my vegan kick (except I still eat a little chicken and fish — sometimes) and I’m totally off dairy. I’m learning how to make lots of good healthy stuff. My latest concocktion is making coconut yogurt. I’ve never tried it, but I love yogurt and those probiotics would be good for my gut so I went for it.

I only needed two ingredients:

Young thai coconut (I bought a case at the asian store)

Probiotic powder

You basically take about 3 cups of meat and 1 part of the coconut water (at least that’s the ratio I’m working with) then whirl it into the blender. Once it’s all nice and smooth drop 1 or 2 capsules worth of probiotic powder, then put it in a jar to “ferment” the way some single ladies do sitting on a bar stool by their lonesome waiting for some guy to talk to them. After about 4 hours (or more) the yogurt should have cultured and it’s ready to be put in the fridge to cool.

Now, the hardest part of this process is opening the coconut . I’ve seen tons of You Tube videos on how to open a coconut. You basically whack the coconut on top three times with the bottom edge of a butcher knife and pry open the “head.” I didn’t have a butcher knife, but I did have a cheap knife and a hammer. So, off I went and whacked

Privacy and My Private Parts

I recently read a post by Kdaddy23 titled “Whoa … Creepy is Okay Now?” inspired by an article on MSNBC titled “How Facebook Makes Creepy Behavior Normal.” The MSNBC article talks about the issue of social surveillance, the behavior of Facebook users to stalk and be stalked and how this has become the norm. The article likens social surveillance to that of a panopticon prison in which the guards are positioned on top of a tower with a 360 degree view of the prisoners. I was first introduced to the term “panopticon” years ago when I read Michel Foucault’s book “Discipline and Punish: The Birth of the Prison.” The book examines the dynamics of the prison system and how this transcends into the power dynamics of institutions wherein the watcher has the power over the watched. (Now this is a general synopsis because I don’t want to get too

I’ve been tagged

There’s a fun game going on. It’s called “Tag You’re It” and Amor’s Thoughts just tagged me.

Here are The Rules.

1. You must post the rules.
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post and then create eleven new questions to ask the people you’ve tagged.
3. Tag eleven people and link to them on your post.
4. Let them know you’ve tagged them!

Amor’s Questions:

1. What do you think happens when you die? I’ll most likely go to heaven if  the “Powers that be” forgive me for all my schlong and revenge posts. And when I become that spirit in the sky, I’ll become ubiquitous in the world wherein my consciousness will be one with mankind and I will have the ultimate understanding about life and existence. Although … this would be ironic because it’s too late to do anything about my newfound insight … this is the irony of life and death.
2. Creation vs Evolution? I believe in survival of the fittest! I was created by my parents, but I’ve evolved into a pragmatic dreamer who believes that dreams can turn into reality if you stay persistent in your goals and not let negativism put a monkey wrench in your progress. 
3. Will there ever be an end to suffering? No, because

Fighting for my right to make my own mistakes

In a world where words such as fairness and justice are open to interpretation I understand that such ideas can have varying meanings at varying degrees.

After all I think that earning a million dollars for merely waking up in the morning is “fair” but it’s a pipe dream unless the value of a millions dollars downgrades to about zilch.

It would be justice for anyone who has done me wrong to grow a third

Have you ever …?

Zoesees inspired this post.

Have you ever …

met a man you didn’t like only to date him and realize that you truly didn’t like him?

hid from someone you haven’t seen in years because you looked like crap that day?

looked in the mirror and said who is that?

ordered 3 super-sized fries at a McDonalds and asked for separate bags so the cashier wouldn’t think it was for you?

kicked a man on the