I Touch Myself

Ever had an out-of-body experience when you feel the bliss of solitude in a room full of people?

I was standing in line at the post office yesterday and out of boredom I started singing this song.

Crazy Freaks Club Official Theme Song

The Crazy Freaks Club needs an official theme song and our member Lizzie Cracked of Running Naked with Scissors blog showed her awesome freakiness by suggesting these three videos.

Now it’s up to you to vote for your favorite vid and make it OFFICIAL!

You don’t have to be a star to deserve my love

I often wonder when and where I’ll fall in love gain and with whom. 

In retrospect, I’ve always fallen in love with smart men who made me laugh. Oh, they made me cry as well, (I wouldn’t be human if I’ve never cried over love) and I suspect that when I find my “true love,” the gamut of emotions I experience will include a few tears, but lots of laughter and joy.

He won’t be perfect, but he’ll be wonderful in my eyes. He won’t be a rocket scientist, but he’ll understand my complexities. He won’t be rich, but he’ll be full of sweetness and light. He won’t be famous, but I’ll know

What a Wonderful World Full of Troubles

Today:

I checked my  bank account and saw how poor I am. I can save some money by not shopping … for food.. Good news is that I needed to go on a diet anyway.

I poured sour milk on my cereal. It’s a good thing I noticed the clumps before I started eating. 

I ran out of shampoo and washed my hair with soap. My hair is now nice and

Best Revenge Songs by Women

There’s no such thing as turning the other cheek when someone’s done you wrong. Sweet revenge is orgasmic.

Reality makes me crazy

I live in the lala-land of my mind. Although I need to face the realities of a malfunctioning universe thinking about it just makes me crazy. Here’s why: 

As we get older and wiser we get wrinklier and forgetful.

The advancement of technology only means more tech FAILS.

The world keeps going round and round, which is why we’re all dazed and confused.

An over-populated world makes it hard to find my “one and only.”

There are too many ways to have sex

I Love this Sweet Transvestite

If you’ve read my latest short story “Man from Malutopia–A Story of Genital Proportions” then perhaps you’ve read some of the comments from my dear readers and what inspired this story–gender neutrality and gender bending. I’ve had a strange fascination about this subject for years and it started when I first saw “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” in my sophomore year of high school.

High Heels are not made for walking

I emailed my sister a picture of these platform heels I’ve been eye-loving. She said that it was too high for me. So I said I know, but they’re so cute. Then she sent me this You Tube video of a model falling on the runway along with this message “if she can’t pull it off, neither can you.” 

Damn she’s right … she’s always right.

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© 2011 Lafemmeroar

Hilarity cures my moody blues: Warning–second video might not be fit for delicate ears

After two days of unbridled eating that started with the buffet brunch on Father’s day, I struggled to get into my GAP jeans this morning and just when I thought I’d be able to close it, the zipper broke. Then while in line at the dry cleaners, an old lady chastised me for using the F-word while talking on my cell phone. I wasn’t talking very loud and what in the heck was she doing snooping in on my conversation anyway? To top it off the cleaners couldn’t get the red stain out of my silk blouse. Guess where the red stain is? Yup, right where my nips would be. If I wore that blouse on a cold day, I’d be red beaming. Sometimes, life’s little nuisances give me the moody blues. So, I clicked on my list of bookmarked You Tube videos for a chuckle or two to brighten my mood:

My Favorite TV Dads

My dad, in his humanity, is a flawed man. But he is the only man who has never let me down and he is the only man who I’ve ever truly trusted.

Now let’s get on with the show. In honor of Father’s Day here are clips of my favorite TV dads. Dear readers, I urge you not to miss the last video as it is one of the funniest scenes I’ve ever seen.

I watched “The Andy Griffith Show” every day as a kid and I especially loved the relationship between Andy and his son Opie.  Watch and see if you can identify the little boy in this scene.

Watch this clip of “The Cosby Show” as Heathcliff Huxtable tries to get his daughter Rudy to eat her veggies.