New Words in the English Dictionary

Here are the latest words added to the English Dictionary: 

Cougarland: A place for cougars, usually a frat party or sports bar, to find no strings sex with a younger guy. “Ladies pack lots of condoms, we’re going to Cougarland … yay … yay … yay!”

Yeah Right: A pseudo documentary where producers put wackos in contrived life situations that will bring the diarrhea out of their personalities. “The stench of television is due to the extreme popularity of Yeah Rights.”

TUT (TotallyUn-Talented): A term used to describe television personalities devoid of artistic or intellectual value. “I put my brain in a jar when I watch TUTs on the “A-List New York.” or “The Kardashians received the TUT statue for outstanding stupidity at the First Annual Yeah Rights Awards.”

False Hope: Products that claim to transform a schlong the size of a crayon into a schlong the size of a huge cucumber. “He takes a dose of ‘false hope’ every morning.” (Note: The only way to make a small cock larger is if its owner acts like a big dick.)

Vaginalympics: A sex romp where a chick lies on her back for a few hours while a bevy of schlongs poke and prod her girly part. “She won the “Loosest Cooch Gold Medial” for taking on 100 schlongs at the Vaginalympics.”

BacterialandingTo have sex inside a cubicle where people pee and poop. “Her proclivity for bacterialanding sent her to the doctor’s office for extreme itching of her girly parts and tush.” (Note: You’ll have to wash more than your hands after a night of bacterialanding.) 

Bush-whacked: The painful process of removing hair for the sake of making an adult’s girly part look like an adolescent’s. “She got bush-whacked to transform her forest into a clearing.” (Note: What else would you call getting your hair yanked down there?) 

Silicone Valley: The hollow part between a woman’s fake boobs. “The stripper stashed tips in her deep Silicone Valley.”

ThumbnasticsThe ability to text at an unbelievable speed. “Arthritis impaired her thumbnastic abilities.”

FUNDs (Fat Undies): What a crazy chick wears when she’s feeling less than svelte. “I’ve been wearing FUNDs every day for the last two years.”

SALI (Single Again and Loving It)–What a healthy serial monogamist feels after a break-up. “The SALI went from miserable to happy when she finally broke-up with a M.I.L.K. or “I’ve been a SALI so many times that it’s become a lifestyle.”

thoughts?

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© 2011 Lafemmeroar

About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

22 Responses to New Words in the English Dictionary

  1. totsymae1011 says:

    Vaginalympics? This is a volunteer process, huh. *smh* Scary and quite nasty.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @totsymae

      It is scary, but lots of “women” in porn and amateurs tend to brave the “sport.”

  2. Cinnamon says:

    Wonderful definitions. ESPECIALLY the one TUT in regards to the Kardashians.

    Btw….. I totally expect you to drop by my blog tomorrow. I’m starting a new hop. It’s called:

    The Old Lady Blog Hop Hope fo see ya there !

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      I definitely will and I’ll put a post on the CCC 🙂

  3. Ugly Shoelace says:

    Hahahah. You’re brilliant.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Thank you … I wish my brilliance reared it’s stubborn head more often … 🙂

  4. imakeeper says:

    Thumbnastics! I looooove this… and unfortunately, I would never be able to compete in this event because I am a horrible texter.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      It’s the tweens that are “thumbnastical” …

    • zemeraime says:

      Im guilty of this! If my Moms near me,, she throws her phone at me and says” Here,,, text her this” and I feel like I’m a court reporter typing out what she needs said to her friends. lol

      • Lafemmeroar says:

        @zemeraime

        Wouldn’t it be funny if they actually had jobs for people to text for others …

  5. “Vaginalympics”
    Never heard of that one. Are they taking volunteers? HA HA. x

  6. mysterycoach says:

    OMG LOL 🙂 !

  7. Well I had to laugh. I’ve never hear of half this stuff but it’s very amusing

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @countingducks

      I never heard of them either until I started writing them … 🙂 Glad you liked it.

  8. zemeraime says:

    LOL!! I love it,, “FUNDs” I love my big girl panties,,, If I have to change and wear string for a sex appeal,, I pass. Like I say, ” If Im not comfy, I’m not going to have a good day!” lol

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @zemeraime

      “I’m not going to have a good day” is funny because I’ve felt that way a few times myself with those dental floss like undies. I like thongs, but it can be bothersome …

  9. The T says:

    I take exception to the false hope definition…. i think “head” solves that problem quite nicely.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @ T

      You mean as in giving it or getting it? 🙂

  10. Zoe says:

    I am, once again, leaving your post smarter than when I arrived 🙂

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @ Zoe

      Oh that is just wonderful 🙂 Glad my craziness added a bit of brain power …

  11. Wordplay: my favorite game! Thanks for the laughs! 🙂

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Anytime Lorna 🙂

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