Twisted Crossed Words and Coined Phrases

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog?

A catty bitch

What’s a crazy person who thinks they’re sane?

A logical loon

What do you do when you see a woman with PMS?

Hide

What do you call a bath in the land of King Midas?

Golden Showers

What is another name for a strip club?

Fool’s paradiseย 

What a chick gets during a threesome.

Double whammy

What do you call a limp schlong?

Pipe down

What do you call a ho in hot water?

Floozie in the jacuzzi

What a couple does while engaging in bondage.

Tie the knot

What’s another term for a boob lift?

Tits up

A sick person passing gas.

Ill-wind

Another term for revenge.

Quid pro quo

What a man does in a strip club.

Pass the buck

What happens when gluttons go to a buffet.

Feeding frenzy

Nominated for Best Humor Blog atย Bloggers Choice Awards. Please vote ๐Ÿ™‚

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ยฉ 2011 Lafemmeroar

ย 

About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

25 Responses to Twisted Crossed Words and Coined Phrases

  1. magsx2 says:

    Hi
    Thanks for the laughs, they were great. ๐Ÿ˜†

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      You’re welcome mags ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Aurora, HSP says:

    Nobody does Crazy Chick like you do! Thanks for another original twist on the malfunction of the universe. Laughing all the way to dreamland ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      I love your comment Janice. Thank you for being such a good friend and for being the positive generous person you are. Now enjoy your dreamland ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Phil says:

    I love to start off the day with a good laugh! Thanks. Now what exactly is the fee for using a coined phrase? Does it require us to pay you money or just homage? ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Just oodles and oodles of homage ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. sami116 says:

    LOL
    YOu should stop doing this Lafemme, I laughed so hard my mum thinks I am a loon.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Sami

      You mean you haven’t told her?!!!!!!!

  5. Phil's Lounge says:

    ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. Tori Nelson says:

    I’m a veteran joke killer. I can’t remember punchlines or swap them or make them up completely. I might just have to print this post for my next dinner party appearance ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Hi Tori,

      Hope they work out for you ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Oh, thanks. Now I’ll spend the day trying to come up with a few of my own. It’s like getting homework.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Carl, I’m sure you’ll come up with some hilarious ones ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. jules says:

    ha, I loved each single one of them!!! :p

    And yep, stay away from me if I’m on my PMT and haven’t taken my tablets…. :/

    Jules
    http://andsuddenlyisee.wordpress.com / http://wordshakermag.wordpress.com

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Hi Jules,

      Glad you enjoyed them ๐Ÿ™‚

  9. I like them all ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Glad you did ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. jsh0608 says:

    These were great. :0)

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Thanks. Glad you enjoyed them ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. My Fave: What do you do when you see a woman with PMS?
    Hide
    Fab. Xx

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Hiding is the best policy in that scenario ๐Ÿ™‚

  12. Shonnie says:

    Love you — thanks for the laugh. I did get your e-mail and I want to take part. This whole medical issues things has been slowing me down so bad. Thank you so much for including me. Crazy Chicks and Butt Kickers! ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Look forward to your answers. I hope you feel better soon. ๐Ÿ™‚

  13. hollyjb says:

    Oh man. So I found them all funny, but was especially glad I wasn’t drinking anything when I read the PMS comment. That was a mix between a snort and a laugh. The kind you get when someone’s trying to hold it in, but can’t help but let it escape. Also the bondage one made me lol. ๐Ÿ˜›

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Hey Holly!

      Glad you got some safe chuckles out this post. I should make a disclaimer that Lafemmeroar should not be held responsible for any injuries incurred in reading her blog while drinking a beverage.

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