Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman

Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman. An old post that new readers might enjoy 🙂

I refuse to be promiscuous. I’m a serial monogamist and I can still count my partners in my head even though I’d like to forget about some of them.

I refuse to pay for sex, but I’ve paid in non-monetary ways through aggravation, misery, heartache and time.

I believe in ladies first. Selfish men are made forreal dolls not real women.

I don’t mind bondage so long as I’m the one with the free hands and feet. 

Size doesn’t matter. You don’t have to be a “cock star” baby to be in my bed. You just need vigor and endurance. 

A good mind “f&ck” is the best foreplay.

You can be an animal in bed so long as you’re gentlemanly about it. 

Sex can happen anytime, but true love is once in a lifetime. 

Just because you’ve made me scream and moan doesn’t mean I’ll nod and say yes to anything else.

I like men who are into breasts, but I hate mammas boys. 

Being single doesn’t mean desperate. I’m picky, but I do tend to pick wrong sometimes. 

I’m an expert on self-love. Why I’ve broken many “buzzers” in my time. How many men can say that they’ve broken their hand spanking the monkey?

What’s your sexual manifesto?

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© 2011 Lafemmeroar

About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

23 Responses to Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman

  1. mysterycoach says:

    Where on earth is the reblog button?

  2. You made me laugh. Again!
    I’ve been married forever so my manifesto comes from a completely different point of view.

    If you spend the day in the lounge pants you slept in, park yourself in front of the television for hours at a time, leave your plates and glasses and newspapers scattered on the floor and your shoes in the middle of the room, the chances of you getting any are about zero.

    If you take a shower in the morning, put on clean clothes, pick up after yourself and spend at least part of the day with me instead of the television your chances are pretty damn good.

    In my world, some of the sexiest things a man can do. Make a good cup of coffee. Put away his clothes. Empty the dishwasher. Carry on a meaningful conversation.

  3. Why did it take me this long to click over here and read this shit. Damn, I finally found my soul sister!

  4. Phil says:

    The mind is the ultimate sex organ. A little whispered word at the right time can trigger a thought, which can trigger a stirring, which can trigger a craving, which in turn can trigger a …

    Is it me, or is it getting warm in here?

  5. veehcirra says:

    This is just so fun to read, girl where do you come up with this cool stuff…

  6. What Phil said… 😉

  7. Phil's Lounge says:

    The stimulation of the heart and mind, real friendship, passion and more importantly true love…are the key points of my manifesto….
    A lot of truth in yours Lafem….humorous but honest…a good read, as always.

    Much Love honey.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Thank you Phil. I’m always so pleased to see a reader share their viewpoints. And just as I try to find hilarity in reality … I know that humor can be found in honesty as well 🙂 Glad I haven’t bored you yet …

  8. This is AWESOME.I shall vote.

  9. renxkyoko says:

    Hahaha ! Can’t say anything about this, YET. No relationship experience, YET. * cough*

    Cheers !

  10. Anne Schilde says:

    I love this!!

    Flirting is fun! It doesn’t mean I want to cheat. If someone else liked it enough to put a ring on it, be respectful.

  11. danroberson says:

    There is someone out there who can ring your bells and strum your heart strings,and you like each other. A good sense of humor is also good so you’ve got a good start.

Talk to me :)

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