Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman

Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman. An old post that new readers might enjoy 🙂

I refuse to be promiscuous. I’m a serial monogamist and I can still count my partners in my head even though I’d like to forget about some of them.

I refuse to pay for sex, but I’ve paid in non-monetary ways through aggravation, misery, heartache and time.

I believe in ladies first. Selfish men are made forreal dolls not real women.

I don’t mind bondage so long as I’m the one with the free hands and feet. 

Size doesn’t matter. You don’t have to be a “cock star” baby to be in my bed. You just need vigor and endurance. 

A good mind “f&ck” is the best foreplay.

You can be an animal in bed so long as you’re gentlemanly about it. 

Sex can happen anytime, but true love is once in a lifetime. 

Just because you’ve made me scream and moan doesn’t mean I’ll nod and say yes to anything else.

I like men who are into breasts, but I hate mammas boys. 

Being single doesn’t mean desperate. I’m picky, but I do tend to pick wrong sometimes. 

I’m an expert on self-love. Why I’ve broken many “buzzers” in my time. How many men can say that they’ve broken their hand spanking the monkey?

What’s your sexual manifesto?

Join the Crazy Chicks Club.

Visit my page on Facebook.

Check out the latest: Crazy Freaks Club.

© 2011 Lafemmeroar

About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

23 Responses to Sexual Manifesto of a Single Woman

  1. mysterycoach says:

    Where on earth is the reblog button?

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      It’s the button that says “Press This” 🙂

      • mysterycoach says:

        oooh it’s up there! I was looking down here. heh…

        • Very funny comment! 🙂

  2. You made me laugh. Again!
    I’ve been married forever so my manifesto comes from a completely different point of view.

    If you spend the day in the lounge pants you slept in, park yourself in front of the television for hours at a time, leave your plates and glasses and newspapers scattered on the floor and your shoes in the middle of the room, the chances of you getting any are about zero.

    If you take a shower in the morning, put on clean clothes, pick up after yourself and spend at least part of the day with me instead of the television your chances are pretty damn good.

    In my world, some of the sexiest things a man can do. Make a good cup of coffee. Put away his clothes. Empty the dishwasher. Carry on a meaningful conversation.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Love your manifesto 🙂

  3. Why did it take me this long to click over here and read this shit. Damn, I finally found my soul sister!

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      When I started this blog I was hoping to find kindred souls. Hello nice to meet you. Check out my Crazy Chicks Club 🙂

  4. Phil says:

    The mind is the ultimate sex organ. A little whispered word at the right time can trigger a thought, which can trigger a stirring, which can trigger a craving, which in turn can trigger a …

    Is it me, or is it getting warm in here?

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Oh you’re so right Phil. There have been many times when a few well placed words got me stirring … oh and yes it is getting warm. 🙂

  5. veehcirra says:

    This is just so fun to read, girl where do you come up with this cool stuff…

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      @veehcirra

      Oh my noodle never runs out of material … 🙂

  6. What Phil said… 😉

  7. Phil's Lounge says:

    The stimulation of the heart and mind, real friendship, passion and more importantly true love…are the key points of my manifesto….
    A lot of truth in yours Lafem….humorous but honest…a good read, as always.

    Much Love honey.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Thank you Phil. I’m always so pleased to see a reader share their viewpoints. And just as I try to find hilarity in reality … I know that humor can be found in honesty as well 🙂 Glad I haven’t bored you yet …

  8. This is AWESOME.I shall vote.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Thank you Christina. You know — you do — do it all. You visited, you read, you commented and now you’re voting. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂

  9. renxkyoko says:

    Hahaha ! Can’t say anything about this, YET. No relationship experience, YET. * cough*

    Cheers !

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      In time you will ren …. 🙂 And your manifesto will rock I’m sure 🙂

  10. Anne Schilde says:

    I love this!!

    Flirting is fun! It doesn’t mean I want to cheat. If someone else liked it enough to put a ring on it, be respectful.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Hi Anne,

      Flirting is good for the feathers 🙂 And I agree be respectful of the ring … 🙂

  11. danroberson says:

    There is someone out there who can ring your bells and strum your heart strings,and you like each other. A good sense of humor is also good so you’ve got a good start.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      I think so too Dan. And thank you for the encouragement 🙂

Talk to me :)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: