The True Meaning of Words in the Dictionary

April 1, 2014 17 Comments

Wikimedia Commons

Wikimedia Commons

I was at the used book store the other day when I came upon a book titled:

“The True Meaning of Words.”

People with corks up their butts have banned this book for decades, but I got my hands on it now and I’m sharing these super-fabulous words with you my dear readers. So here are some of my favorites:

Backbone: A schlong up the butt

Upbeat: A man who masturbates standing up

Brainchild: A 40-year-old man who acts like a kid

Creepologist: A professional creep

Male Enhancement: A man in touch with his feminine side! 

Tadpole: A little wee schlong

Technical Virgin: A chick who’s been poked on every orifice except “one“

Rock n Roll: Wham bam thank you ma’am dude who is asleep before you can say “Is that all I get?” 

Manx: Girdle for men

Whimsical: Someone who breaks out into song at the moment of climax!

Backwater: Real loose bowel movements

Pristine: A prissy adolescent

Deadwood: A flaccid schlong

Highwayman: A homeless schlong

Dictionary: A book about schlongs

Tenderloin: A bruised schlong

Horrific: A slut who’s terrific in the sack

Hormone: A slut moaning

Horsy: What a slut sees

Hoecake: A chick who pops out of a cake during a bachelor’s party

Howdown: A slut who just fainted

Backhoe: A slut who likes it up the rear

Self-Service: Masturbation

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© 2014 Lafemmeroar

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About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

17 Responses to The True Meaning of Words in the Dictionary

  1. Carrie Reimer says:
    April 1, 2014 at 8:44 am

    LOL good ones!! The last one reminds me of a few years ago I had gotten a “Self Serve” sign in a load of scrap and I hung it above my bedroom door as a joke and forgot about it. My landlady popped by unannounced to have a visit and I noticed her staring at something. I followed her gaze and saw my self serve sign. She looked at me and I smiled and shrugged and said”What can I say?” she just gave a blank stare. She was a miserable bitch, she probably needed to serve herself more often.

    Reply
  2. Peter Wells aka Countingducks says:
    April 1, 2014 at 8:50 am

    You learn something every day !

    Reply
  3. Eric says:
    April 1, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    Misfire: A newly divorced Crazy Chick who ignites her Ex’s schlong with untraceable combustible fluids.

    Tokyo Rose: A Japanese Crazy Chick lap dancing her next schlong-victim after she gets him drunk with sake.

    Dramarama: When a Crazy Chick sticks it to a schlong who acts like he is the center of the known universe. A real fullamus rectumus.

    Reply
  4. MJ says:
    April 1, 2014 at 10:49 pm

    Given that meaning for “Deadwood”, does that mean a “Redwood” is a penis whose owner has been masturbating too much?

    Reply

  5. Pingback: The Jolly Lobster Blog Award; All Jolly and No Pinchy « Swim In The Adult Pool

  6. CeeLee says:
    April 5, 2014 at 10:41 am

    I just wanted to let you know that I’ve nominated you
    for The Jolly Lobster Blog Award.
    No, really.
    I did. 🙂

    You can see the details about it at my blog:
    http://wp.me/p2MHY5-1a3

    If you don’t get into the blog awards, that’s okay too.
    I still like you.
    And I won’t make you or threaten to break the appendage of your choice. 😉

    Sincerely,
    CeeLee

    Reply
  7. Valentine Logar says:
    April 6, 2014 at 11:48 am

    I needed that, I did. Thank you

    Reply
  8. Inion N. Mathair says:
    April 8, 2014 at 2:01 pm

    You should publish this, sweetie, that way us crazy chicks can place our right hand over it and swear allegiance to the club. 😉

    Reply
    • Lafemmeroar says:
      May 15, 2014 at 9:38 am

      Thank you Crazy Chicks 🙂 I’ve toyed with the idea of taking my best posts and making it into a free e-book. I just need the assistance of a graphics person …. 🙂

      Reply

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