The True Meaning of Words in the Dictionary

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I was at the used book store the other day when I came upon a book titled:

“The True Meaning of Words.”

People with corks up their butts have banned this book for decades, but I got my hands on it now and I’m sharing these super-fabulous words with you my dear readers. So here are some of my favorites:

Backbone: A schlong up the butt

Upbeat: A man who masturbates standing up

Brainchild: A 40-year-old man who acts like a kid

Creepologist: A professional creep

Male Enhancement: A man in touch with his feminine side! 

Tadpole: A little wee schlong

Technical Virgin: A chick who’s been poked on every orifice except “one“

The True Meaning of Words in the Dictionary

Wikimedia Commons

I was at the used book store the other day when I came upon a book titled:

“The True Meaning of Words.”

People with corks up their butts have banned this book for decades, but I got my hands on it now and I’m sharing these super-fabulous words with you my dear readers. So here are some of my favorites:

Backbone: A schlong up the butt

Upbeat: A man who masturbates standing up

Brainchild: A 40-year-old man who acts like a kid

Creepologist: A professional creep

Male Enhancement: A man in touch with his feminine side! 

Tadpole: A little wee schlong

Technical Virgin: A chick who’s been poked on every orifice except “one“

Insulting Blog Comments Make Me Wanna Rant

The other day, a commentator from another blog called me “immature” and “vapid.” This was because “said” blog  posted a “rebuttal” about one of my posts.

If you’re thinking why is Lafemme being so cryptic?

Well … let me just say that the post in reference had nothing to do with “schlong whackings” in fact it was a rather sweet post about a man’s love … investigative noodles will figure this out. Anyway, I was okay with the “immature” comment since I’ve always believed that I’m a “mental” 12 year old … my noodle just refuses to EVOLVE.

I’ve been 12 for decades!

BUT VAPID? First I didn’t know what the hell that word meant, but all I know is that I felt soooooo

New Words in the English Dictionary

Here are the latest words added to the English Dictionary: 

Cougarland: A place for cougars, usually a frat party or sports bar, to find no strings sex with a younger guy. “Ladies pack lots of condoms, we’re going to Cougarland … yay … yay … yay!”

Yeah Right: A pseudo documentary where producers put wackos in contrived life situations that will bring the diarrhea out of their personalities. “The stench of television is due to the extreme popularity of Yeah Rights.”

TUT (TotallyUn-Talented): A term used to describe television personalities devoid of artistic or intellectual value. “I put my brain in a jar when I watch TUTs on the “A-List New York.” or “The Kardashians received the TUT statue for outstanding stupidity at the First Annual Yeah Rights Awards.”

False Hope: Products that claim to transform a schlong the size of a crayon