Me and My Spanx
September 16, 2014 2 Comments
Me and My Spanx
August 26, 2013 23 Comments
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© 2011 Lafemmeroar
The Devil Made Me Eat It
August 8, 2013 17 Comments
My raging appetite is like a randy man-whore constantly out on the prowl for his next piece of bootie.
Excess is never good, which is why I’ve tried to tame my lust for food with simple self-control. If I want cheesecake, I eat a slice instead of two. If I want ice cream, I have a scoop instead of three. If I’m craving pasta, I have one serving instead of several. My onsies food strategy worked and I looked svelte without the SPANX. Read more of this post
The Devil Made Me Eat It
June 28, 2011 44 Comments
My raging appetite is like a randy man-whore constantly out on the prowl for his next piece of bootie.
Excess is never good, which is why I’ve tried to tame my lust for food with simple self-control. If I want cheesecake, I eat a slice instead of two. If I want ice cream, I have a scoop instead of three. If I’m craving pasta, I have one serving instead of several. My onsies food strategy worked and I looked svelte without the SPANX. Read more of this post
Double My SPANX
May 14, 2011 2 Comments
Unless I starve myself for a week (and that’s not going to happen), I’ll look like a sausage that’s come out of its casing in the putrid olive bridesmaid dress I’m sentenced to wear for my girlfriend’s wedding next week. I needed help. So, I bought myself some SPANX. For years I’ve denied the idea of using a girdle, oh excuse me body shaper as they’re called now, but I have to face facts. I can’t look svelte without any help.
I bought the SPANX Slim Cognito Shaping Mid-Thigh Bodysuit with a “Super-Duper” slimming level according to the product description. I put it on then I put on the dress. Not bad. And if I held my stomach in all day, fixed my hair a certain way that actually made my cowlick work for me, and dusted my face with make-up I would look (oh dare I say it) like a MILF as my friend the MILK had said.
Then I wondered if the SPANX would hold up. Would my muffin top re-surface against the powerful hold of SPANX after I’ve had a half-dozen glasses of champagne, and consumed the bread, salad, the surf and turf menu with dessert and wedding cake served at the reception? Would my svelte line maintain? I had drunk a bottle of water during my musing and things were already getting a little tight. So, I went online and ordered another pair. Doubling up on the SPANX would surely support my “svelteness” even after drinking and eating my heart’s content. Wish me luck next week dear readers as I surely will need it.
SPANXfully yours,
Lafemmeroar
© 2011 Lafemmeroar
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