Online Dating Is It a Good Idea? Part 3.1

Here’s Part 3.1 of my online dating adventure, which focuses on the first site I joined. I still don’t know how far I’ll go with this quest. I have learned that searching for “the one” online is like choosing produce at the grocery store. You don’t want to pick the bruised or the rotten, so you need to sniff, pinch and handle them a bit to see if they’re any good.

Lavalife has three sections for user profiles: Dating, Relationships and Intimate Encounters. Signing up with Lavalife means that I can hypothetically go bowling with a fun guy, have sex with a stud while I look for “the one” in the relationships section. My paranoia and trust issues kicked in when I realized that my pick in the relationships section could also be balling bowling with a fun chick in the Dating section and having bootie calls with an S.O.S. in the Intimate Encounters section. Why, he can turn out to be a real M.I.L.K.  I asked myself if I wanted to get involved with a site that in my opinion created such “relationship” confusion. Curiosity won over and I forged on.

Lavalife makes it easy because I just had to click on the multiple choice answers in filling out my profiles although the site does let you write more about yourself in the “In My Own Words” section.

Each section allows users to have an opening line and these were mine:

Dating: I go dutch 

Relationship: I do

Intimate Encounters: Anything goes

Now did I tell the truth; the whole truth so help me oh supreme being? Yes. Let me just qualify that “anything goes” is rather vague and can be interpreted in any way “my way.” I believe that I was totally honest and within my realm in filling out my profile in the Dating and Relationship sections. When it came to filling out the Intimate Encounters section I decided to have a little fun and explore parts of me I didn’t know “I was.” This after all is an exploration.

Within seconds of saving my Intimate Encounters profile I received messages (this could be a coincidence) from six members. The messages went from the mundane (hello, how are you, hi there) to downright TMI (I have some kinky fetishes and nasty fantasies too, tie you up and tickle you, I’m into whips, and I like food thrown at me). My first reaction was to laugh and I did. I didn’t respond (sniff, pinch or handle) as I had more important things to do like stare at the wall, work, and blog.

Missed the previous posts? Click here for Part 1 and Part 2.

Stay tuned for my next installment.

Lafemmeroar

About Lafemmeroar
Writer, blogger, humorist. Visit my blog to know more :)) Laughing at the malfunction of the universe is better than crying about it.

31 Responses to Online Dating Is It a Good Idea? Part 3.1

  1. hollyjb says:

    I’ve never been on a dating site. My sister tried it and it worked for her. I can’t decide if I want to start now or wait till I’m back home. I’m very interested to see how this ‘experiment’ goes.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      So am I 🙂

  2. momfog says:

    “anything goes” will certainly give you oodles of material for the blog, if nothing else. Can’t wait to see what happens.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Yeah, but what kind of oodles? hehe 🙂

  3. totsymae1011 says:

    Oh honey, I wish you the best on this journey. I do know of a woman who married someone in Europe and she’s been there 4 years now. That information came by me reading about her. But don’t limit yourself to the computer 🙂
    http://www.totsymae.com

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Don’t worry I won’t. I have my friends (not with benefits though) and if I get really bored I have things in my “goodie drawer” that will help tie me over until I meet one I’m interested enough to “let in.” Thanks for stopping by–hope to see you again 🙂

  4. Online dating doesn’t sound worse than any other kind of dating. Back in my glory days of dating, we didn’t have this “online” thing. We had to use what were called “the personals” in the back of these collections of thin sheets that were called newspapers. There wasn’t much of a screening process back then either. And you had to leave awkward phone messages when making initial contact. I’m thankful I don’t have to go through that anymore (and hopefully won’t again).

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Your comment reminds me of the movie “Desperately Seeking Susan.” The characters connected by placing ads on the personals. I’m still perusing the “pickins” so we’ll see what happens. Thanks for visiting 🙂

  5. Bleau says:

    Been on five dating sites. Inactive on the one my sister met her husband of 7 years on. Closed others. Have only 1 open now but it’s more like Facebook or other social sites. It’s a crazy place, online dating – lies, lies and more lies – ancient pictures – etc. I think I just tired of all the “weed whacking” required of one to get to the good stuff. Much to share one day when I’m up to it but be forewarned: repetition is the naturally emerging theme LOL. Looking forward to how your experience unfolds 🙂

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      omg you’re so hilarious ….what’s the name of that 80s song titled “lies, lies, lies” or something like that? I need to google that song

      • Bleau says:

        I know the song you mean (I think LOL) but not the artist off the top of my head… I just “unprotected” my Online Dating Vocabulary written back in March after a few months on the dating sites…basically says it all for me LOL

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Okay here’s the video I was looking for in response to your comment “lies, lies and more lies”

      • Bleau says:

        Yes! Good one and the Thompson Twins, too 🙂

  6. ooolala! I can’t wait to hear more!

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Stay tuned 🙂

  7. Mindless Rambler says:

    This has been a most interesting series of posts. Not sure how I would attempt things if I ever went back on the dating scene. Scary thought but I always have a good supply of batteries no matter what 😉

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      Oh, the triple As are so important to keep in stock (at least that’s what mine takes). Stay tuned 🙂

  8. Haha, funny how people interpret “anything goes”. I’ve dated online as well. Signed up for a paid membership website, used an promotional code and started filling in my profile. Read it over, found it incredibly booooring, so I just started writing sci-fi stories about me being a viking, wanting a female partner to help me take down the “Crystal Dragon of the North”. Stuff totally unrelated, you know. I knew that if NOW someone will find my profile interesting, then I’d want to date them because they’d clearly understand my personality, so we’d be a good match. I did receive tons of responses and finally found my “partner in crime”, so to speak. We’re happily married for two years and we’re planning on having kids…..erh, little vikings of our own hehe

    Good luck though, you’ll eventually find someone you’ll like.

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      We’ll see how my journey goes … “anything can happen.” Thanks for visiting 🙂

  9. I think your “opener” for relationships is perfect–what else is there besides “doing” them? I mean…every relationship ends up so different. What could someone possibly say about their dating style?

    Also–I’ve heard of a lot of food/sex fetishes, but never throwing food. I almost wish you had met that guy just so I could read about what that “intimate encounter” would be like!

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      The funny thing about the food guy is that he looked very skinny in his picture. Maybe the ladies should throw food in the direction of his mouth.

  10. Stewie says:

    I think that stating ‘anything goes’ will undoubtedly lead to numerous weirdos thinking you’re one of them! I’ve had more experience of online dating than I would have liked and, on the whole… I hate it! This is my perspective:

    http://thislittlethingcalledlife.com/2010/07/17/online-dating/

    I hope you don’t mind me leaving a link, as it is relevant. 🙂

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      This went to spam and it’s a good thing I read it. Interesting experience. I’m taking it slower as I’ve only been on a few weeks and the photo searching is rather daunting.

  11. Phil Gayle_For Singles and Couples says:

    Hi Honey,
    Well, I read all three posts, great writing as usual.
    I know some have met people through on-line dating site, I seem to remember one of my sisters recently telling me that a friend she knew actually got married to a guy she met on-line.
    More often than not, you actually hear of the negative stories, the nightmares, which put people off and quite rightly so.
    There a positives & negatives in most scenarios but I still think that the best way (not guaranteed) to meet a reasonably normal person is via your personal off-line network, i.e. friend of friend, friend of family or someone you work with or study with.
    Problems always happen when people put on fronts to impress others, for fear of letting people see who they really are.
    I always encourage people to be themselves, that way, they don’t need to get tired with the act, people will either like them or not.
    I also think having sex too early complicates matters and clouds peoples vision, making it harder for people to see whether or not they are a great match…I know, define “too early”..yet another matter of opinion. 😛

    I ‘obviously’ have some workable suggestions, be patient with me my friend, we will discuss this and anything else you write along these lines in more depth as time goes by.
    I will also be writing about this and more, why wouldn’t I?…Relationships are my passion area. 😉

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      I can’t wait until you start posting about this topic on your blog!!!!!!!!!! I do have a friend who met her husband online (during the early days) back then we thought it was weird, but THEY ARE STILL TOGETHER. Today … it’s the norm. I never had much luck with “set ups” and “blind dates” you should read “Fetish of my Blind Date” (I think that’s the blog post title) anyway I’ve always found my schlongs boyfriends on my own … haven’t had much luck there either, but I sure had fun while we were together … life is what you make it … even if it isn’t forever 🙂

  12. Bodhirose says:

    I knew when you put “anything goes” that you would attract some interesting characters. I’m noticing that a lot of people responding here have stories of people making a good match so it is possible. I wish you the best, Laf. 🙂

    • Lafemmeroar says:

      This is a repost of that “adventure” unfortunately I am still happily single 🙂 I wish you the best as well 🙂

      • Bodhirose says:

        Oh, right, I remember now that it was a repost. I totally got caught up in the “drama” of the whole thing and forgot. I’m now happily single too…again. 🙂

        • Lafemmeroar says:

          Gayle … the best relationship we will ever have is the with ourselves … we are all beautiful works in progress … I’m just wondering when I’ll be a beautiful completed piece of art … do you ever wonder that?

          • Bodhirose says:

            I’ve finally come to that realization too, Laf. I need to be content with myself or I’ll never be content with anyone else. That has proven to be true every time. And, yes, I’ve wondered that many times. I’m still waiting…

            • Lafemmeroar says:

              That’s why we’re both crazy chicks always looking at the brighter side of the chaos!

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